a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner

[vetdrem]

Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

Here is a little test that may help you decide.

The answer can be found by posing the following question:


You're walking down a
deserted street with your wife
and two small children.

Suddenly, a Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner,
locks eyes with you,
screams fanatical obscenities,
raises the knife, and charges at you...

You are carrying a
Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.
You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.


What do you do?

THINK CAREFULLY AND
THEN SCROLL DOWN:


Which of the following most closely matches your answer?



Democrat's Answer:


. Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

. What is a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP?

. Does the man look poor or oppressed?

. Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling?

. Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

. Could we run away?

. What does my wife think?

. What about the kids?

. Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

. What does the law say about this situation?

. Does this pistol have appropriate safety features built into it?

. Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children?

. Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

. Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me seriously?

. If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

. Should I call 9-1-1?

. Why is this street so deserted?

. We need to raise taxes, have paint & weed day.

. Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior?

. I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.

. This is all so confusing!



............ ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ........ ......... ..
Republican's Answer:


BANG!


............ ......... ......... ......... ......... ......... ........ ......

Southerner's Answer:


BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!


BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!


Click..... (Sounds of reloading)


BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!


BANG!


BANG!


BANG!



Click


Daughter:


'Nice grouping, Daddy!'
'Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?!

Son:


'Can I shoot the next one?!'

Wife:

'You ain't taking THAT to the Taxidermist!

[crispy critter]

Re: a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner

What can I say..... Southern by the grace of God!

[Hank Jarrett]

Re: a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner

Bang.


Sorry, Not a Republican, but I an an ex rifle pistol team guy. I don't need but one shot. ;-)

Hank

Also a bit of the Scot in the family tree. Hate to waste good ammo. One centered shot is always a nice grouping.

[Robert Lees]

Re: a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner

...Also a bit of the Scot in the family tree. Hate to waste good ammo...

That made me spill my whisky on my new keyboard, Hank . (Scot blood in me too...Campbell, to be precise).

[crispy critter]

Re: a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner

Sorry guys, I think I've got more Irish and Sweden in me then Scott.....lol

[Hank Jarrett]

Re: a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner

My mothers family is mostly Irish, my dad's side was English, went to Scotland, then to Ireland before coming to the U.S. (something about missing horses?). From what some of the folks in the family have said our name was originally Garrard but by the time we got here it was Jarrett, Jerratt, Jerratt, Jarratt, sometimes as before with just one t or one r or any combination plus a bunch of other versions. The spelling was provided by the people checking them in. I don't think most of our family could read that far back.
Easier to just say "American".

Hank

[Randy]

Re: a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner

I guess I am a Conservative (Republican) but I aspire to be a Southerner Good one, I will make sure to share it at the next church social.

[astjp2]

Re: a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner

Most southerners I know cant afford the Kimber, they would be more into a Smith or Glock.

[Hank Jarrett]

Re: a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner

Or a .44 Colt revolver.

Hank

The old cap and ball revolvers do produce an IMPRESSIVE cloud of smoke!

[flyguy]

Re: a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner

Your initial premise is faulty. Why would a Democrat be carrying a pistol? Chuckle.
DC