St. Peter

[ROllerton]

A man appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates.

"Have you ever done anything of particular merit?" St. Peter asked.

"Well, I can think of one thing," the man offered. "Once, on a trip to the Black Hills of South Dakota, I came upon a gang of bikers who were
threatening a young woman. I directed them to leave her alone, but they wouldn't listen. So, I approached the largest and most heavily tattooed
biker and smacked him in the face, then kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring, and threw it on the ground. I yelled, "Now, back off or
I'll kick the @#$% out of all of you!"

St. Peter was impressed, "When did this happen?"

"Just a couple of minutes ago."

[Len Petterson]

Re: St. Peter

St Peter has 2 fellows at gate on the same time. Both are badley ruffed up.
Ok what did you do to each other? he asked.
I was just flying along and he came to close and we collided, Karl answered.
And you St Peter asked Johnny, obvius the better dressed off the 2.
I know you becuase I have had climbses of you before when you din't pay attention !
But I was just flying along and :"He "came to close and we collided.
What planes where you flying?
Sir, a Lear 25.
And You: adressing old Karl:
A Taylorcraft Sir.(;f

Ok Karl you can come in, you had your hell on earth.
And you young man, shall go back renovate a Taylorcraft.
Maybe it will make a pilot of you!
Just remember to keep your eyes outside the cockpit!

[Robert Lees]

Re: St. Peter

Into a Belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy, looking like he'd just been run
over by a train. His arm is in a sling, his nose is broken, his face is
cut and bruised and he's walking with a limp.

What happened to you?" asks Sean, the bartender.

"Jamie O'Conner and me had a fight," says Paddy.

"That little shite, O'Conner," says Sean, "he couldn't do that to you,
he must have had something in his hand."

"That he did," says Paddy, "a shovel is what he had, and a terrible lickin'
he gave me with it."

Says Sean, "you should have defended yourself,
didn't you have something in your hand?"

"That I did," said Paddy. "Mrs. O'Conner's breast, and a thing of
beauty it was, but useless in a fight."

[Len Petterson]

Re: St. Peter

Only in Irland Ahh!(;f