Grumpy old man

[tuckerhound]

grumpy Old Man

A grumpy old man walks into a local First Baptist Church and says to the
secretary, 'I wanna join this damn church.'

The astonished woman replies, 'I beg your pardon, sir. I must have misunderstood you. What did you say?'

'Listen up, dammit. I said I want to join this damn church!'

'I'm very sorry sir, but that kind of language is not tolerated in this church.' The secretary leaves her desk and goes into the pastor's study to inform him of her situation. The pastor agrees that the secretary does not
have to listen to that foul language. They both return to her office and the
pastor asks, 'Sir, what seems to be the problem here?'

'There IS no damn problem!,' the man says. 'Looky here, I just won $200 million bucks in the damn lottery and I want to join this damn church to get
rid of some of this damn money.'

'I see,' said the pastor. 'And is this bitch giving you a hard time?'

[Frank DeBartolo]

Re: Grumpy old man

A prude and religious lady was babysitting two kids that had "hippie" type parents. When it was time for breakfast she asked the little boy what he wanted for breakfast. The little boy said "Shit I don't know**I'll have some of those goddam Cheerios. The babysitter was taken back and washed out the little boy's mouth with soap (Lava).

Then she asked the little girl what she wanted for breakfast and the little girl said "You can bet your sweet ass it wont be those goddam Cheerios.

Frank D
N43684

[jdoran]

Re: Fast thinking

A customer walked into the grocer and asked for a "half head of lettuce". The produce manager took a full head of lettuce and walked to the back of the store to the meat cutter---

"Hey Vince, can you cut this in half for me? Some asshole wants 1/2 a head of lettuce!!

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw something, and realized the customer had followed him and was standing right behind him!!

He quickly added, "and this gentleman would like the other half"