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  • Self-employed?

    A man owned a small farm. The Low Pay Commission claimed he was not paying proper wages to his employees and sent an inspector out to interview him.

    "I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them" demanded the inspector.

    "Well" replied the farmer "there's my farm hand who's been with me for 3 years. I pay him £200 a week plus free room and board.

    The cook has been here for 18 months and I pay her £150 per week plus free room and board.

    Then there's the half-wit who works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here. He makes about £10 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally."

    "That's the guy I want to talk to --- the half-wit" says the inspector.

    "You're already talking to him" replied the farmer.
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